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‘Out, damn’d spot!’ say U.K. city councils
By Paul | February 23, 2009
‘Out, damn’d spot!’ say U.K. city councils
By Denise C. Baron
Apostrophe abolishers have their say—and their way—in the U.K
Here’s a novel solution to your niggling punctuation dilemmas: When in doubt, throw it out.
That’s the fate of the humble apostrophe in Birmingham, U.K. It seems the little symbol’s proper usage was too much for the Birmingham City Council to deal with, so they’ve decided to abolish it.
This is the same council who produced a visitors’ brochure with a sumptuous aerial photo of the city on the cover. It was Birmingham all right. Birmingham, Alabama. The council dismissed the photo swap, explaining that the intent was to depict a city, not necessarily their city.
It’s tough to compete with brainpower like that.
And it may be tough to go about your normal business in that city, now that its signage and databases are being stripped of their possessives. So now St. Paul’s Square is St. Pauls Square, making it appear as though there were two or more saints so named and thusly honored. D’Arcy Avenue becomes the curiously capitalized DArcy Avenue. And if your name is O’Dell, oh well.
Defending the de-apostrophe decision, one councilor explained, “I don’t see the point of them.” The Wakefield Council in West Yorkshire doesn’t either and has taken its cue from Birmingham by banning the apostrophe, too.
If you find this disturbing, you have plenty of company. The backlash that bubbled up shortly after the decision was publicized shows no signs of dissipating, even as the apostrophe is disappearing from city signs. The Plain English Society, the Plain Language Commission and—wait for it—the Apostrophe Protection Society have registered their outrage by denouncing the councils’ mindsets as “choosing the easy way out, dumbing down and showing contempt for [those] who take a pride in the English language.”
Time will tell whether their protests will have an effect.
In the meantime, let’s examine this tiny sliver of punctuation that bears a funny name, plays several distinct roles in the English language and, in doing so, has bested the Powers That Be in Birmingham.
The word hails from the Greek apostrophein, meaning “to turn away,” such as when a presenter turns away from his audience to address an invisible or imaginary entity. This definition, however, does little to shed light on its function as a mark of punctuation.
So etymology aside, below is what the apostrophe does.
A superscript sign (‘), the apostrophe serves two main purposes and a tertiary one.
1. Contractions. In contractions, the apostrophe indicates the omission of one or more characters from a word.
You can’t (cannot) do that.
He doesn’t (does not) hear me.
You’ve (You have) correctly answered all five questions.
Let’s (Let us) have another cup of coffee.
It’s (It is) 5 o’clock (of the clock).
He’s (he is) a child of the ’70s (1970s).
As we’ve come to know and love it, the English language has more than its share of quirks, and contractions are no exception. Take this example:
The kitten won’t (will not) come out from under the bed.
You might think the contraction for will not would be willn’t. However, such a word formation does not exist; won’t is correct.
2. Possessives. The apostrophe, often combined with the letter “s,” indicates possession.
Bill’s mother is coming over for dinner.
The children’s toys were strewn all over the lawn.
Please refill the dogs’ bowls.
In the last example, the reference is to more than one dog, so the apostrophe follows the plural form of the word dog. You would not add another “s” after the apostrophe.
Now, which of these two sentences is correct?
Regis’ haircut was too short.
Regis’s haircut was too short.
When a proper name ends in “s,” form the possessive by adding an apostrophe and “s.” Therefore, the second example above is the correct one. Another example is Bridget Jones’s Diary.
3. Certain plurals. This usage is dependent on the style you follow. Some style manuals, such as The Associated Press Stylebook, do not use an apostrophe in forming certain plural words; others, however, such as The New York Times Manual of Style and Usage or The Chicago Manual of Style, are proponents of this apostrophe function.
Here are some examples, with the non-apostrophic spelling in parentheses:
He taught me the ABC’s (ABCs) of Microsoft Outlook.
The company replaced those PC’s (PCs) with newer models.
The 1960′s (1960s) represented a turning point in pop culture.
Associated Press notwithstanding, certain plurals would simply look unpronounceable without the apostrophe, so use it.
Mind your p’s and q’s
Do not use the apostrophe to form plurals of surnames. It makes your sentence confusing and appear incomplete, as in these examples:
The Smith’s embarked on their holiday cruise yesterday.
The Smiths’ embarked on their holiday cruise yesterday.
Both examples are incorrect; they cause you to ask: What belonging to the Smiths? Or who related to the Smiths?
Compare those examples with the following:
The Smiths embarked on their holiday cruise yesterday.
The statement clearly informs one that the Smith family is not at home. No apostrophe.
Of course, after having digested all this, you may be inclined to side with Birmingham’s councilors and may even be considering relocating there. Still, you have to admit that, for a featherweight of a punctuation mark, the apostrophe packs quite a punch.
And if its proponents have their way, it may be down but not completely out, and the Queen’s English will remain just that: the English belonging to the Queen.
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